February 2004 Archives

I saw this on another blogger's website and thought it would be lovely to post for your viewing pleasure. Mean people suck, but mean politicians are just nasty.

     Mr. Bush was caught the other day by a question about his opposition to gay marriage. It's the question so many people have wondered about for awhile - how same-sex marriage would actually harm the institution. Bush responded that "marriage between a man and a woman is the ideal" and that he should "drive policy toward the ideal." I wonder who he's been talking to?
     I wonder if he's ever talked with a gay or lesbian person because I can tell you that me marrying a woman is quite short of ideal. Whose ideal is this? His maybe, Rove's perhaps, or is it a religious ideal? Well, this isn't Iran so that's inconsequential. And is all policy is to be geared toward the "ideal" only, then are we going to start taking kids away from single parents? Or maybe we'll do like they did in Florida awhile back and take the kid away from the lesbian parents and put him back with his child-molestation convicted dad because you know that's ideal.
     My point here is that one person's ideal may not be another American's ideal, and that's part of living in a free society. If Mr. Bush can't see that - well i think he has no business in the Oval office anyway...
(source: Bush defends same-sex marriage ban)

Beacon Journal | 02/27/2004 | Republicans didn't start gay nuptials culture war

Mr. Charles Krauthammer of the Washington Post writes today that although he doesn't support the Federal Marriage Amendment, he certainly doesn't feel that the conservatives are to blame for the current "culture war." Well then, I wonder who is.

His rhetoric is that those activist judges are going to change our culture by "judicial fiat." Of course the courts should have no say in how laws are subjected to the people - that would create a system of checks and balances. He's also upset that one state may be able to change the course of the culture war because of the Constitution's full faith and credit clause. He says this may mean that a minority would have their way over the majority's wants.

Well thank goodness Mr. Krauthammer wasn't around when the Constitution was written otherwise we might live somewhere called Iran. Seriously, where was this man in government and civics class in high school? What makes him think when a majority of people want something that causes harm to a small group of people that is right?

Back to his assertion that "the activists have forced the issue…" Yeah, and women who are assaulted were asking for it, right? Weren't black people just asking to be slaves when they stood on the shores of Africa? Where does he get this reasoning from? When people are being bullied by the majority and their civil rights are not being respected, what should they do? Sit quietly and do nothing? This is one of the people who would rather have gay and lesbian people be invisible even though wrong is being done to them. I'd hate to think of what he'd say about Rosa Parks.

In the end, it has not been queer folks who have "kindled" the culture war. It was not Mayor Gavin Newsom or the Mass. courts that began this fight. It has been conservative people like Mr. Krauthammer who have for years sat silent while a significant portion of Americans have been stigmatized and without equal protections of the law. It has been conservatives like President Bush who have pushed for further discrimination and ignorance towards gays. It has been ultra-conservative, power-hungry, money making special interest groups like Focus on the Family who have spread hate and misinformation about the gay community. Now that we're fighting back Mr. Krauthammer is upset. All I can say is that he's going to get a lot more upset when we are as equal as he is under the law.

Just a little bit from the White House press conference after the big announcement.

Q Also, this would be the first time since the Prohibition era that a constitutional amendment had been sought that would actually restrict rights in America. Though there may be some people in this room who remembers how well the Prohibition amendment went down, does the President really want to be the first President since the Prohibition era to deny people rights?

MR. MCCLELLAN: Again, I think the President addressed this very issue in his remarks when he talked about how we are a free, just and tolerant society, and he talked about the importance of respecting all individuals, but that this is about an enduring institution of national importance.

How does one spin shit mentally so quickly - to take a question and remove it from reality while it is being answered. A "just and free society" restricts people's civil rights based on unexplained rationale? What an ass! If you have the stomach for it you can read the whole press briefing and see for yourself a) what an asinine concept this is and b) what fuckheads are in the White House.
(source: Text of Marriage-Related Press Briefing by Scott McClellan)

     For a long time I supported civil unions over gay marriage. Although I felt I knew what was right, I didn't think gay marriage would happen soon enough to be of importance to me. I figured we had a better chance of getting civil unions through, and some rights are better than none. That has all changed. I won't settle for second best anymore.

     I was very cautious about this topic as I try to be understanding of other people's beliefs and concepts of "tradition." While I abhor yelling matches and ridiculous politicking, I am always open and willing to rationally debate almost any topic. While I will not yell at any individual (unless Bush shows up at my doorstep) my patience is wearing very thin, and other people's beliefs don't seem to qualify them anymore to debate me on my civil rights. I'm not so cautious in my wording these days.

     The religious right has changed that over the years as they have attacked my community. The Ohio Government changed that when it put a bill into place prohibiting the same access to rights as everyone else. And President Bush put the nail in the coffin when he declared war on the gay community as if we were a bunch of terrorists.

     There is no rationale for what is wrong. Religion has no place in this country to make me a second-class citizen. There is no basis for grounding progress to a halt because you are uncomfortable with it. It's not your life, it's mine. It's not one person's or religion's country, it's everyone's. This rhetoric may offend some, and for that I would normally be sorry - but not today. I'm not sitting in the back of the bus anymore.

What can I say? I guess it would be better if they were funnier. It's not terribly insulting except to the straight people. I mean the one guy is digging through the trash to redecorate.

     Apparently, Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger feels that not only will gay marriage destabilize hetero marriages, but that it will also cause civil disruptions and chaos. "The next thing we know is there are injured or there are dead people, and we don't want to have that. We don't want to get to that extent." What the hell is that? That's rif*ckindiculous! Hallye Jordan of the CA attorney general's office said there had been no report of riots or threats to public safety. Perhaps our God-given rights should simply be acknowledged and we could move past this and on to bigger issues. And may I just ask who are the people who would be causing civil unrest? Gov. Schwarzenegger proves only that he is ignorant about the issue, and more interested in playing politics than people's rights. America doesn't need another leader like this actor.
     I've often wondered what would happen if queer Americans were to be denied their rights for a further prolonged period of time, and even to have their rights reduced from what we have now. Another Stonewall? I'm telling you, the last place they want a replay of Stonewall is in San Francisco - those drag queens kick ass!
(source: Governor fears 'unrest' in San Francisco)

     It's been a few days since I've updated with anything substancial here. I've been working on the new iteration of this website/blog which should be online by next weekend sometime. New domain name and all... Been into my second weekend of closing which is somewhat draining, especially when I don't seem to have enough staff. I went into work tonight feeling sick to my stomach, and on top of that ran my head off for hours. One more night...
     Last I read more than 3200 GLBT couples have been married in San Francisco. That's amazing. Mayor Gavin Newsom is like a modern day MLK. I'm sure there are quite a few people who would take umbrage to that comment, but in many ways it is undeniably true. It's so refreshing to know there are people out there willing to stand up for what is right, and to make some noise about it. I'm not sure where it's going to end up, but I hope that it turns out well for those who have gotten married. I wonder if hetero marriage is beginning to collapse yet, or has Brittney remarried?
     Something about the past few days at work - no more than 30 minutes after my arrival I get a ton of grouchy, cranky, holier-than-thou people who just irritate me so! Today a woman got all pissy with me because I was trying to help her and she wanted something done "just a certain way." Instead of simply asking me to do what she wanted, she instead lectured me about why she wants it done and how I should be respecting her. Well, of course, I'm a mind reader. How silly of me! The day before I told someone they could move to a shorter line - most people like this - and she responded with a roll of her eyes and the word "JESUS!" I'm not sure if He died for her checkout experience, but in her mind He may as well have.
     Have a wonderful week everyone, and may your diety help you checkout faster!

     Message from the fortune cookie: "Don't be afraid to take that big step."

If you've read my blog for more than a few months you may know that I've been a Howard Dean supporter for quite awhile. He was the only democrat to truly stand up and speak his mind without worrying about putting a spin on everything. More than anything I really wanted the truth from a politician, and for someone to be as angry as I am about the present state of affairs in our government - mainly Mr. Bush. Howard Dean was the one who got me engaged in the primary. He demonstrated on numerous occasions that he knew the power was with the people, and that he was willing to stand up for what's right. Although I'm sad to see him leave the race, I'm very grateful to him for making a difference. I truly feel that without him the democrats wouldn't have had a chance in November.

     I read today in another (supportive) blog that since the US government is making it clear that queer people are not welcome here, why not have a huge expatriation movement? This brings up an interesting point - one that I've considered a number of times. My sister and I have had several discussions that end with "we should all just move to Canada!" I've often thought it would be fun for all the queer people to pool together and buy a nice island somewhere. There would be beautiful floral arrangements everywhere, interior design would leap to the next level, and bad hair days would be a thing of the past.
     Seriously though, it sounds nice but it's a seperatist thought. I don't want to leave my country. This is my home as much as any right-wing zealot's. I will stay and fight for what is right. If people just left when they didn't like what was happening, the USA would be just a bunch of white, straight, christian men - no women, no blacks, no latinos, no Jews, no gays. Very boring. Neither will I concede the battle for civil rights for any or all Americans. If I don't fight for this one, who will be next? You know the famous quote. And if the queer people all left, what would happen to the next generation of queer Americans? Would we have to send them secret plane tickets or special visas to get on to our little island? And then what would the little queer nation be like? Suffice it to say I love the diversity America has to offer - if only we'd let our country reach its potential and truely be the land of the free.

2,500 Same-Sex Marriage Licenses Issued
There is hope. I especially like the quote at the end:

"In the past we have taken a stand against policy that discriminates against interracial marriage. It took many years of fighting to end that," Teng pointed out. "The California constitution at one point prohibited people of color from attending public school. It took court action to end that."

"We are in a new era of civil rights," Teng continued. "San Francisco has taken a strong stand against this discrimination on same-sex marriage. Again, it's going to take many years and a tough legal battle to change it. But I am absolutely confident that at the end of the day we are going to win."

     Did you know that it is National Condom Week? I had no idea until I read it on GMHC.com. The Bush administration doesn't exactly promote things like this anymore as they choose to believe that all people favor abstinence. This should serve as a reminder to all those, especially young people who think they're invincible, who choose lives with a bit more risk. Even if you think you know who someone is, or if you're head over heels in love, your first responsibility is to yourself. Be safe!

     A customer came in today wanting to return a bunch of stuff without a receipt. My fellow blogger friend was working at the service desk at the time and she called me over since the woman wanted to see a manager. I explained everything that had already been explained to her, and she stared at me for a moment before telling us that we were "both so full of shit" that we stink. As she turned to walk out she dropped an f-bomb and stormed out. I left the service desk barely able to keep a straight face. Moments later she returned with her receipt to do the return. Why not in the first place...? Ah, but again I must remember, it doesn't have to make sense...

     I just can't believe the news! Barbie and Ken are splitting up after 40 years! Apparently Barbie needed a new man - perhaps one who doesn't have physical deformities eh? Mattel says that they decided they needed "time to spend some quality time -- apart." But this sends a message now doesn't it? With gay marriage being such a hot topic recently the Bush administration will be all over this. Is Mattel sending the message that when things don't work out, you dump someone and get another? I'm sure the FTC will launch a full blown investigation, just as soon as the FCC is done with Janet's boob. (will it never end?)
     Really, don't worry about Ken though. Barbie and him may have split up, she may have gotten the car and the house, but he and GI Joe are having a blast. ;)

Thank you, Mr. President ... an Advocate.com exclusive
     So well put. Certainly the gay marriage issue is one that has been forced, and now serves only politicians and the media. Such a sorry state our country is in when power plays and BS serve more of a purpose than the fundamental values that our country was founded upon.

     More fun work stories...
     At 8:30 this morning I was in the parking lot chasing a car! A woman forget her $40 worth of purchases at the register. Just walked right out. By the time I got out the door I saw her pulling away in her car, so there I am so early in the cold morning chasing after a car.
     Later a man groaned at me and a cashier. We were trying to make small talk with him like we usually do with everyone. But the response in most people is friendly conversation. This guy "humfed" at us - well, kinda a cross between a "humf" and a growl. Quite odd.
     Later in the day a woman came inside after a man rammed her car in the parking lot. Not just once, but in true fashion of a Fried Green Tomatoes scene, he rammed it twice! Apparently he thought that this woman took his parking spot. He then followed her into the store and hung around until he saw security watching.
     Never a dull moment...

From 365gay.com:

Kerry told NPR: "...I don't personally support [gay] marriage as we understand it within the context of religion."

On Feb. 4, Kerry voiced his disagreement with the Massachusetts ruling which, in addition to mandating legalization of full same-sex marriage, forcefully rejected the notion of civil unions as unconstitutional.

Within the context of religion.. hmmm? Well are we a theocracy or not? If we are then fine I move to Canada. If not then you move the hell out of my way of equality. Yeah, Kerry has done more for gay rights than Bush (my cat has done more), but he's still pandering. Either that or he doesn't understand that "seperate is seldom equal" thing. I would still support Kerry if he's the Democratic nominee, but that's only if he doesn't make any ignorant statements, beyond the ones he already has.
(source: Kerry Says He Could Support Constitutional Amendment)

     Picture it... 1993. Suburban NE Ohio. A young guy is coming to terms with being gay. Not even sure of what he feels, society is already telling him that he's abnormal, unwanted, and will be ultimately alone. The radio begins to blare Melissa Etheridge's Yes I Am.

I will stand firm in the tempest
I will ride destinys' trail
To believe when the truth comes up empty
To hold and respect without fail
Come and be one in the motion
A desire they cannot comprehend
Never to question again
For I am your passion your promise your end
Oh yes I am

She was so proud and shameless about who she was. You could sense the fight in her, that she would not fall to pressure to be anyone but who she was. And a young gay man contemplating how to live his live (or not) chose to live it with honesty and pride.

     So today Melissa Etheridge speaks again to that same young man - well, not quite as young. She sings the song Giant with as much pride and defiance as I can remember her singing tracks from Yes I Am. The sense of renewal and gratitude I feel is overwhelming.

From Melissa Etheridge's album Lucky : Giant
You tried to hold us down
You tried to hold us back
You tried to make us wrong
You tried to make us crack

You wanted to see us cry
You wanted to see us leave
You didn't count on the tide
You didn't count on the pride
You didn't count on me

I am a giant
And you will not make me fall
And you will not make me crawl
I am a giant
And I'm not alone
Winds of change have blown
And walls come tumbling down

Lines from the public:
regarding the people on news message boards who do nothing but spout rhetoric and ignorance. (not to mention nasty words)
They're angry people sharing their anger. Let them have it all to themselves.
Equality in all its forms is ultimately prevailing.

     This headpiece was created by a designer for a fashion show in Seville. I thought wearing a ball cap would never go out of style, but this one will be around forever! Seriously, where would you wear that? You couldn't wear it to the opera because it would block the view of people behind you. You couldn't travel in it because the FAA would make you remove that thing faster than nail clippers. You couldn't drive in it because you wouldn't fit into the car. (unless you drove a bus) I'm sure it's a deal at around $10,000 or something...

     The U.S. Senate has begun work on the only amendment to the US Constitution to discriminate on the basis of minority class. Yes, they've begun work on the federal anti-gay marriage amendment. They're headed up by a man named Sen. John Cornyn who is a notoriously anti-gay bigot. He vowed to oppose hate crimes, gay adoption and to have sodomy remain a crime. He's also another idiot that doesn't understand the role of the judicial system calling those who interpret laws "activists." They're called judges silly bigot. Just another to add to the list of ignorant, greedy, hateful people that should have a place in history right next to those who fought for slavery.
(source: Senate Begins Work On Anti-Gay Amendment )

     My wonderful friend Dan and I were talking this evening, and the topic of nasty gay-hating people came up. Dan says that the reason that they don't like us is because they see us having more fun than them. At first I just thought this was funny, but the more I think about it the more sense it makes. Go have fun!

     According to an article from the AP, gay marriage opponents protested in Boston today. Some of them spoke clearly about marriage by shouting "Repent or perish!" Archbishop Sean P. O'Malley said the protest was not about "hatemongering." Well, I can see that there was a very loving spirit among people, especially those waving Jesus around. I'm sorry but if you're basing people's rights on religion, you ought to be reading history and perhaps watching less of the 900 Club.
     The basing of law on religion baffles me to this day. I cannot understand how in the United States of America, the land of the free, we must still base everything on the Bible. It's as if no one lives here but Christians. And on top of that, none but the most evangelical, conservative, hateful ones get the most press. Seriously, they hate me because of a line in Leviticus that states a man shall not lie with another man, but they hypocritically forget that within the next several pages it speaks of people being unclean for eating shellfish, cutting their hair, and wearing clothes of two different fibers. There is no rationalization for that except that those people are either ignorant or hateful, immoral, and greedy.
     Well, the anti-gay folks want to vote. They feel they have the majority power to oppress the minority. Amongst all their god-loving, patriotic rhetoric, I can think of nothing less American than to oppress a group of people, or to take away their rights to life, liberty, and happiness. It's terrible that they do this in the name of God - I know too many real Christians who must be sickened by all this.

(source: Opponents of Gay Marriage Rally in Boston )

bilbored - 2/6/04
Commentary on gay bloggers and the recent atmosphere of sadness and anger among their blogs.

[updated 9:55pm]
     As I thought about some of the things written in this blog, I reflected on some of the things mentioned about "constant low grade depressions and sadness." I think that this is something that I've struggled with in life - trying not to internalize all the hate and rhetoric that goes on around me. (can we say internalized homophobia?) Not only that, but there's also the part of society that says that I'm not normal, and that I should be. This Ohio marriage law is just one more thing that speaks from the government and society to me saying I'm abnormal and should be treated that way. It takes a lot of energy to keep your head up in this kind of environment, and a lot of mental energy trained on analyzing the rhetoric and discarding what I know doesn't apply to me. It's listening to "gays are going to hell" and having to, on some level, think to myself "no, that is wrong. that doesn't apply to me. the person saying that is ignorant. i'm a good person." That may sound foolish, but I think a lot of queer people have to do this to stay sane. Otherwise the suicide rate would be a lot higher than it already is. As I think about this more and more, I just wish gay kids didn't have to go through that, and I hope for a day when they won't have to.

LiberalOasis: Archives For the Week of February 1, 2004
Very interesting analysis of why Ohio moved and pushed so hard to get the worst anti-gay bill into law.

     It's been an interesting day. Jon and I spent awhile looking for pieces/parts to connect our new water softner and neutralizer. We got a lot of brass elbows, valves and pipes. Then I learned how to solder brass pipes together under the supervision of Jon. It was easier than I thought - almost kinda fun. (Just imagined the pipes were Taft's fingers - just kidding!) We got a decent amount of work done in the time we had - still have to tap into the main water pipe to get everything going. Really it was just nice to spend the day with Jon - didn't really matter what we were doing.
     Not thinking much about DOMA today - giving myself a day of sanity and rest. :) I'm much calmer...

These are the people that I see directly responsible for Ohio's most punishing, unjustifiable law regarding the GLBT community. I post these here not as a hateful act, but so that we don't forget the faces that oppress, and so we don't take for granted the ones that support.

Ohio now officially has the worst DOMA and the most discrimination for queer folks. I am livid beyond words. I contacted my representatives - the governor even - and my government does not represent me whatsoever. They have effectively made me a second-class citizen in my own home state. What's next? Camps? I think Ohio needs to take a look at where it's going, and the effect of discriminating against an entire group of people - its own citizens. All I can do now is know that I will continue the fight, and let my anger become productive when it comes election time for those who promoted discrimination and hateful rhetoric. Until then I am mad as hell.
(source: Taft Signs Same-Sex Marriage Bill)

     Thanks to Mr. Bill Sietz and Gov. Bob Taft, my family will have legislated second-class status in 90 days. I AM PISSED! I usually wait until I calm down to write, but this is f-ing pissing me off.
     Mr. Seitz made the statement that the law won't remove any existing benefits that same sex partners already have. What a liar. It specifically states that state employees won't be able to receive domestic partner benefits. "The bill also prohibits state employees from getting marital benefits spelled out in state law for their unmarried partners, whether homosexual or heterosexual." He also made the statement that it reserves certain tax credits to heterosexual married couples. "'That is a credit that we afford under our income tax laws to people who are married. . .It is not available to one's live-in lover, one's dependent, one's dog, one's cat or one's same-sex partner.'" Excuse me? Why am I grouped into a statement with cats and dogs? What a bigot to compare my relationship with a relationship with an animal or even "live-in lover." Who the F do these people think they are?
     True, I don't have many of the rights now that they just took out of the rhelm of possibility, but that's the point. They made them completely impossible. I'm almost tempted to want to move, but Ohio is my home. This is MY state as much as theirs, so I'm going to make it as much of an election hell when the time comes for these people.
(source: Taft Signs Same-Sex Marriage Bill)

     A customer came in early this morning to return a painting that she bought the day before - I knew because I sold it to her. She had been pretty excited about it. I asked why she was returning it and she replied that it was too big for the space she wanted it for. I said I was sorry it didn't work out for her because I knew how much she liked it. She told me that contrary to popular belief, size does matter. Does it now?

     Yet another reason I am angered and perplexed at the idiocy of our government sometimes. Bush says he's a compassionate conservative, but his rhetoric perpetuates the idea that gays and second-class citizens - not worthy of respect. And then a gay man is strangled to death and the murderer first gets no jail time, and now will spend one year in jail for being a peeping tom. What country do I live in? A country where hate and rhetoric have more value than love and justice apparently.
     Joseph Camber, after celebrating his birthday, was strangled with such force that his larynx was broken. The assailant insisted that he acted out of "gay rage". Imagine what his family must have gone through after finding that the murderer was to have a suspended sentence as long as he didn't break any more laws. This basically affirms that it is ok to kill a gay person. Just a slap on the wrist... Of course he claims that he was hit on by Joseph. Can you imagine the epidemic of dead straight men if women were allowed to kill a man because he hit on her and she wasn't attracted to him?
     What makes me so angry about all of this, besides the mere facts of the case, is that people like Bush go on and on with their rhetoric regardless of the consequences it will have for gay folks. It doesn't matter to them if we're happy, safe, or dead. As long as they can fill their campaign coffers with the money they need to get reelected. Or maybe they're just ignorant morons who don't know any better. Regardless, I'm starting to think this "justice for all" thing is worthless anymore.
(source: News From 365Gay.com)

     The Massechesetts legislature has been up in arms trying to skirt the gay marriage ruling and give gays and lesbians the "seperate, but equal" civil unions. The Senate asked the Supreme Court the following: "Does Senate, No. 2175, which prohibits same-sex couples from entering into marriage but allows them to form civil unions with all 'benefits, protections, rights and responsibilities' of marriage, comply with the equal protection and due process requirements of the Constitution of the Commonwealth and articles 1, 6, 7, 10, 12 and 16 of the Declaration of Rights?" The Mass. Supreme Court ruled today that "The history of our nation has demonstrated that separate is seldom, if ever, equal," and that "it is a considered choice of language that reflects a demonstrable assigning of same-sex, largely homosexual, couples to second-class status." At the end of the ruling under the section entitled "Conclusion" are the words:

The answer to the question is "No."

     Beautiful. Just beautiful. It was awesome to read the text of the Supreme Court's response. All the analysis and rationale for equal rights in marriage is right there. In a society that more often than not is demonstrating its bigotry and ignorance, to read the ruling is not only refreshing but exhilerating.

(source: OPINIONS OF THE JUSTICES TO THE SENATE)

     Is this what it's going to come to? Celebrities of both genders showing off their chests... It'll be like the new fan wave - just show a bo0b for your fans. And what exactly is that on his nipple? It looks like some painful clamp! Ouch! I'm sure the parodies of the "wardrobe malfunction" will be everywhere. It'll be funny for awhile until someone else shows off another body part, and there will have to be another federal investigation. Isn't it funny how it took forever to get an investigation going on the intelligence regarding the Iraq's weapons of mass destruction, yet within hours the government scrambled to quickly and fully investigate Janet's bo0b?
     And since when did a bra breaking become a "malfunction?" Like when a computer malfunction became a "system issue." We keep making simple words and phrases into longer, ridiculous political gestures. Makes you wonder what will be next. Maybe a blog will be a personal news release or an individual situational account. Who knows...

[note: this entry was updated on July 26, 2004 to re-spell "bo0bs" with a zero because search engines were pulling up my site for the wrong reason. There are no celebrity bo0bs here.]

     My friend Danny and I went galavanting around Akron today after having a lovely lunch at the Golden Dragon. Hit a few clothing stores and at one we discovered a brand of underwear called "Change Daily." At first I looked and thought well isn't that funny. Danny suggested, however, there are people out there who probably need that reminder printed on the dirty garmet. Upon realizing the truthfulness of this comment, I wonder how many people really don't change their underwear daily. I mean, wouldn't you realize at some point, you know I've been wearing this underwear for awhile now. Underwear is cheap too! It's not like it costs a whole lot to have more than 2 pairs. Anyway, this is all mindless babble, but sometimes you have to analyze the little things in life. If you always think about the big issues you eventually go insane. So advice of the day, change your underwear daily. Just in case you get into an accident... what would your mother say?

     There is sanity somewhere, and strangely borders the insane state of Ohio. The Indiana Senate passed a bill that would ban gay marriage, but democrats in the IN House said that it's unlikely to even be introduced. This from 365gay.com:

House Speaker B. Patrick Bauer (D-South Bend) agrees. "If the people in Washington want to create issues, they can do that. We don't need to create issues. We have enough issues as it is," Bauer said.

If only more politicians thought this way. Maybe we could work on things like unemployment or healthcare.
(source: Indiana Senate Approves Constitutional Amendment)

     Fred Phelps is once again bringing hate and bigotry to the forefront of local politics. He's now looking to put a monument in a city in PA where a young man lived who committed suicide because he was gay. Phelps would like it to read, "In loving memory of Jim Wheeler, entered hell November 17, 1997, at age 19, a suicide who defied God's warning." Yeah, that's a loving memory. What American (or human being for that matter) would think that this would be appropriate, even as a political statement? There are some things sane people just don't do. Unless you're Fred Phelps.
(source: Phelps tries for another anti-gay memorial)

     I didn't hear about the Janet Incident until I was on my way to work listening to NPR around 2:30. Good grief! I'm afraid to think of what will happen at the Olympics! I guess I didn't miss much by not watching the Super Bowl.
     So I watched most of the Gay Weddings reruns last night. I swear the one couple seemed like they were in trouble even before getting married. I wonder if they'll be on "Gay Divorces" next year. It was an interesting and timely topic though, especially with all the talk of a Constitutional amendment which I think is just plain dumb. Even before you get to the arguments about discrimination and equal rights blah blah blah - there's a human factor that I think a lot of people are missing. Gay couples are just like anyone else, and some even want to be with their partner for the rest of life. Queer marriages are still about love, and about being there for the person you care about. If you really think there should be a constitutional amendment banning that then you should probably check and see if your heart is still there. And the next time I hear about the "Sanctity of Marriage" ... I'm going to go into a diatribe about Brittney Spears.
     TiVo awaits me with two episodes of Star Trek: The Next Generation. Hope you don't wake up to freezing rain and crap... I'm sure I will.

     I was going to write something here about Gay Weddings - I was watching the reruns on Bravo tonight. But instead I will just say that one of the hardest things to do is to sum up 6 years of reflection in a few paragraphs. And then to try and have it make sense to the person you were reflecting about. Friendships and relationships are the blood of life - try not to cut anyone.

     Although Vermont currently has the only civil union system in the country for queer folks, there are ignorant folks there in the government who still want to ban gay marriage. One in particular, Sen. Mark Shepard, wants to amend the constitution of the state to limit it to heterosexual couples. He says, "defining marriage as an institution between men and women is necessary for children, who need to be raised in 'a married family with both a mother's and a father's care, reinforcing for men the importance of fulfilling their responsibilities to children and to women and by offering both male and female role models.'" Do these people always seem to forget about straight couples who don't have children? Are they of the mind that those marriages that don't produce children should be invalidated? I'm sure there are plenty of hetero couples who would be just a little irked at that idea. I guess marriage isn't about love anymore - at least not for those who preach hate.
(source: Bill Would Let Vermont Gays Marry)

     We had a heat wave today - got up to 27 or so degrees. Honestly, when it feels warmer at 27 you know it's been way too cold for too long.
     I chatted with my friend Andrea tonight. She's so much fun to talk to - we have the same sense of humor so that when telling a funny story one of us laughs even before the punchline. She was telling me about this guy who hit on her at a bar one evening by asking her if she knew some people who were having a birthday party or something, then offered her $3 (to buy a drink I suppose.) Just the way she told it was hilarious, but what a moron. She was like, is 3 bucks supposed to impress me? Men can be so stupid. One day an intelligent guy is going to come along though and sweep her off her feet, and it will be wonderful. Until then we'll go shopping at the Short North.
     I think some wedding plans may be in the works here sometime soon for Jon and I. We decided not to go to Canada. We were excited when gay marriage was legalized there, but it still wouldn't be recognized here in the US. (especially not in Ohio) What really matters to us is that our friends and family will be there (Andrea says she'll bawl her eyes out), and not a piece of paper that says we're officially married. All the debate about marriage lately is so ridiculous. It's as if the institution has taken over and the meaning has been lost. The "sanctity of marriage" has been replaced with hateful, ignorant rhetoric. Whatever happened to marriage being about love and being with the person who makes you happy? I feel so grateful and lucky that I've found someone - no matter how legal it is - that loves me as I am, and that is my best friend as well. Screw legal, I'm happy!