January 2005 Archives

GOP Student Group Plans 'Straight Pride Week'
"The general gist is that if you are a straight student on campus be proud, be loud, this is your time to shine."
   Is there are more specific gist that they want to make apparent? And will they wear white robes? Stay tuned for the boring details...

Third Journalist Named In Bush Admin Payola Scandal
   When is this stuff going to get some mainstream press? And when will it end? The third person has been revealed as having been paid by the administration, and I'm sure the list goes on. And of course it was another anti-gay "journalist." I've been told that both sides do this (right and left), but I really don't want anyone doing this. The barrage of information and news we get daily is enough to try to make sense of without having to figure out what is government sponsored propaganda. I think I'll be sending letters to my representatives this week. And by the way, isn't all this illegal?

   How many conservatives are going to turn up on the Bush Administration's payroll? Just recently it turned out that Armstrong Williams was paid to promote the No Child Left Behind Act, and he did it without disclosing that the government had paid him to do so. At least he didn't recall making such a disclosure. How Reaganesque. Now it turns out that Maggie Gallagher, a columnist, was also paid by the White House to promote their "straight marriage is better" circus. She was paid to the tune of $40,000 and you know what, she would have disclosed that fact, but she didn't remember. WHAT??? This is getting to be like the Twillight Zone!
   How is it that these people had mental lapses such that they forgot that they should disclose they were paid by someone to promote a particular point of view, especially in light of the fact that they did it as journalists. It is very disconcerting to me to discover that the government is paying the "media" to write about a specific opinion. The government's goal is to distribute information - not tell us what to think about it. And government in bed with media makes us sound less like a democracy and more like a few particular nations that we were at war with early last century.
   Now to think Margaret Spelling (the new Dept of Education Secretary) is demanding that PBS refund the government for airing a kids program that showed a lesbian couple in Vermont. At least that's the truth - unless of course HRC is subsidizing PBS programming. If my tax dollars are going to be spent to advocate a position against myself, then I damn well want to see lesbians on Public Broadcast!
(sources: Second Anti-Gay Commentator Paid Off By White House, White House Pays Off Anti-Gay Commentator, Cabinet member berates PBS over cartoon)

   I was thinking some more the other day about Butt Paste. Yeah, I was rather bored. Only occasionally... Anyway, I thought that one might think that Butt Paste is for people who have catastophic gas problems. Just seal it all up - no more gas. But alas, Butt Paste is not for gas.
   So here's my own twist on a new product - Super Ass Glue. Not for those with mild symptoms, but for those with persistant and chronic gas. Having problems at work? People wrinkle their faces when they smell you? Having relationship problems? Then Super Ass Glue is for you! Just apply a dime sized bead to your ass, and nothing will come out of there for the rest of the day. Unlike Crazy Glue, Super Ass Glue will wash off with (a lot) of water, so you can relieve in the privacy of your own bathroom. No more strange looks. No more excuses about the dog. Consultation with a doctor is recommended before using this product.

   Last night our local LGBT community center celebrated our 6th Anniversary with a members Dinner and Silent Auction. The dinner was very good (that was the best veggie lasagna!) and many people won some cool things from the auction - autographs from Betty White, Greg Louganis, Olivia Newton John, some wonderful themed paintings, certificates for local services and tickets, and many other artsy items. The best part was the community coming together and having a good time. It was nice to chat with everyone in a casual atmosphere where the topic wasn't limited to Issue One or FMA. I caught up with a few people that I hadn't seen in a very long time, and got to spend time with my extended family.

   I had no idea "Butt Paste" ever existed. Someone returned some today. Luckily I didn't do the return myself because I'm not sure I could have contained myself. I almost lost it when someone returned a massager and told me it didn't work the way it was thought that it would...

   I'm not President Bush's biggest fan as anyone probably knows. But I'm looking at some of the pictures of the inaugural protests, and I'm rather disgusted. I'm not talking about freedom of speech here - I believe anyone has a right to express their views, especially when it comes to politics. But there's a certain line one crosses when protest goes beyond disrespectful to downright gross. Being there, voicing your opinion, chanting, displaying signs, peaceful resistance.. great. Throwing objects at the presidential motercade? What would we be saying if our roles were reversed? We'd say, gosh those people are unlawful, disrespectful, and ridiculous. I'm not putting the pictures on the main page here - you can click the "more text" button if you really want to see them. But Bush with blood dripping from his mouth, and "666" on his crown? C'mon.. Make a statement - make it count. But don't make yourself so ridiculous that you're not credible.
(source: Protesters Target Bush's Inauguration)

   As if gay cartoons weren't enough, now people have the trauma of living on Gay Rd. (named after an explorer) I have a few ideas for what to name the road. I mean if it's really that big of a deal, why not rename it Straight Street? Or even Metro Blvd. How about SpongeBob Ave.? Perhaps the Undisclosed Biway would make it easier to live there. Or maybe they should find something else to do... (source)

   I heard it on Morning Sedition on the way to work. James Dobson and Focus on the Family have proclaimed that SpongeBob Squarepants is gay! Yes, he joins the ranks of Tinky Winky (the Teletubby) in the insidious gay agenda. Just cracks me up. Perhaps we should review all cartoons for gayness. I mean, there was Vanity Smurf. I always kinda wondered about him. There have been longstanding rumors about Bert and Ernie. Gosh I just wonder. Anyone else know of any gay cartoons that we should watch out for? Seriously, if there's a sponge to watch out for it's this one.
   Really, what wackos sit around wondering about the sexuality of a cartoon? Excuse me while I go make sure the sponges in my cabinet aren't planning a coup...

(sources: Right wing warns of gay SpongeBob, Conservatives Pick Soft Target: A Cartoon Sponge)

   For those of you using Internet Explorer, The Rhetoric may have looked a little odd for awhile. I have fixed it - it was bad syntax on a close comment tag. Figures, when I don't quit commenting it'll mess stuff up!

   Bush says:
An inauguration is a time of unity for our country unless you're queer
...every day that I am your president I will serve all Americans except queer ones
We have a calling from beyond the stars to stand for freedom and America will always be faithful to that cause unless you're queer

The highlights are my additions to his speech which will be in the 22nd draft. Sorry if I'm not excited.

   Bush now says he won't push for the Federal Marriage Amendment. Oh that's nice. Thanks.
   HRC says, "Our great hope is that George Bush will back up his new found support for civil unions and respect for all families with his actions." Our great hope? Perhaps it's time to find new hope because that's not support. It was a wedge issue, and it was good for the election.
   I think I'm more irritated right now about the fact that big companies are financing Bush's parties while D.C. is stuck with the security bill.

(sources: Gay TV Campaign Targets Bush Inauguration, U.S. Tells D.C. to Pay Inaugural Expenses)

"...I don't see why a person has to wear a pink triangle to show that he's gay when I don't wear an orange square to show that I'm not."
   Because everyone assumes that you're straight...

   Since I built the new computer I seem to be missing a lot of my music. I could hook the old hard drive up, but the power wires in the case are all tied down. So I'm re-ripping my old CDs, and this has turned into a trip! I have all my old CDs in crates - even ones from high school. My very first CD is in there - M.C. Hammer. My second - Vanilla Ice. No accounting for taste...
   Then there's The Proclaimers CD which I remember from Orchestra camp. We sang this song called Teardrops on the bus. There's all my Stabbing Westward CDs that I bought when I was really angry at an ex-boyfriend. He hated Stabbing Westward - I was the reason. Janet Jackson and Paula Abdul. La Bouche and even Paul Simon in there somewhere. And the odd thing is it doesn't even seem that long ago... but it does.

   Apparently the dice didn't roll the right way at ODOT last night/this morning. Guess they didn't know it was going to snow...? My morning commute that normally takes about 30 minutes took an hour and a half today. Looked like the interstate hadn't been touched by a snowplow. Better luck tomorrow. Or there's always the Weather Channel.

   I was watching Inside the Actor's Studio last night and Martin Sheen was on. It was a very interesting look at his career and his personal struggle to find "transcendence." One of the things he said resounded with me, and I thought I'd post it. Perhaps it's something I should remember when I feel like the world isn't changing fast enough, or when I feel like I'm powerless to change it.
Martin Sheen - Changing Myself (wav)

   That's what our fridge sounds like. Suddenly, as my dear friend Dan says, it had a debilitating stroke. Grandma had to turn the TV up to 22 (high volume) to hear it because the cow in the kitchen was humping the stove. We're not entirely sure if that truly happened or not though... We found a lovely fridge with a display panel on the front - always the geeks. Alas, it won't fit under the cabinets. More shopping tomorrow morning...

Air Force proposal sought gay sex weapon
    The aphrodisiac chemical would be designed to make enemy soldiers sexually irresistible to each other. The resulting widespread homosexual behavior, the proposal suggests, would cause a "distasteful but completely non-lethal blow" to morale.
   Wow! And people loved Viagra! Now if they'd only let gays in the military, this would be a great recruitment tool...

   I neglected to mention that while at my local gay and lesbian Center earlier this week, someone opened the door, threw a pop can in and yelled "FAG!" Maybe it was a Faygo...

   It is apparently one of those days in NE Ohio that is a mixture of Spring and Winter all in one. It's currently 63°F right now, although the temperature is supposed to drop about 40° by the end of the evening. Two seasons in one day. Driving home from work today I had the windows open, and that Spring feeling was in the air. Very nice. Too bad tomorrow it'll be so cold my windows won't hardly open...

   A friend and I observed a number of people wearing overalls at work today. There should be just a few reasons for wearing overalls.
1) You're a farmer
2) You're pregnant
3) You're 2 years old
   They're just not in fashion anymore, are they?

   A woman asked one of my cashiers if she had ever heard of "lip polish." The cashier replied that she hadn't. At which point the woman told her that she had just bought what she thought was bright pink lip polish and put it on her lips, only to discover that it was nail polish.
   Another woman described to me in detail what it meant to be "pussy whipped." Something about buying tampons. Umm.. thanks. She insisted that one day I would find out, but I would have to disagree.

   OK, when 19¢ is too much to pay for end of the season holiday merchandise, I just don't know what to say...

   Usually I do pretty well using the internet to buy things. Recently, not so much. Before Christmas I ordered a gift subscription to Country Weekly for my aunt, and somehow ended up ordering one for myself as well. And just moments ago I booked a flight leaving Feb 3 and returning March 7! I was only going to be gone for an extended weekend... Listening to Travelocity's lovely hold music right now. And wouldn't you guess they are experiencing higher than normal call volume this evening...

[update: I signed into my Travelocity page where I found another number to call. It was the Preferred Member number. Apparently since I book at least one trip per year they've made me preferred. So after an hour of waiting on the one line, my call was picked up within 30 seconds on the preferred line. Amazingly, everything was fixed just like that. I am so relieved - but I still feel pretty dumb for the stupid mistake...]

   I'm on my way to work this morning, listening to Morning Sedition, and for some reason there's a problem with some bakery goods. When did this happen? Is there really a need to reform? The president remarked that there's a crisis here. How can this be? I was just at Giant Eagle and I didn't see anything wrong with their tortes? Is there something the matter with the bakers who are making them perhaps? Maybe it's the pastry chefs who are out to get them with that sly story of "reform" and "the crisis." I know when Bush says it it's not that bad. I mean one minute there's gonna be a mushroom cloud over my head and the next there's something wrong with my torte.
   And is it a specific kind of torte? I wonder if it's that Twinkie dessert that dares to call itself a torte. I guess I can see the problem with that one. But do we need to reform the entire baking industry over a Twinkie? I guess I'll just have to start making my own tortes. I think my insurance will cover it.

   Congratulations to Ed Schultz for his one year anniversary of The Ed Schultz Show. I find him to be refreshingly down to earth, and not hyped up on himself. He speaks his mind, and doesn't make me want to scream every few minutes like Randi Rhodes does. Keep up the great work Ed!

   I don't like conspiracy theories, but I don't like unanswered questions either. I never did understand how all the Ohio exit polls were wrong. I never did understand what exactly happened with the Ohio recount. I never did get how a county had more votes for one candidate than it did residents. And I never did quite get why Blackwell got to be both the Secretary and the head of the Bush campaign in Ohio. (I never understood why he can be such a jackass either) Perhaps I'm just alone in this thinking. Maybe I haven't looked for answers in the right places - if you know where I can find them let me know. I don't want things to drag on forever, but answered questions would be nice. I would like to believe without a doubt that democracy is still at work.
(source: Ten preliminary reasons why the Bush vote does not compute...)

   To those of you who are reading my little online diatribe, thank you for stopping by and I wish I knew why. Almost 100,000 visits last year which is up from the previous year's statistic of about 3. Hope you're enjoying yourself - either that or you're getting really pissed off.
   Happy New Year!