March 2006 Archives

   Something I've been trying to wrap my brain around for a day or so, and I'm not quite coming up with anything. There was a cleanup at my store the other day, to which I was instructed to bring rubber gloves. Umm.. ok. So I find on the floor a condom AND a large soft pretzel. Huh?

   You know all the jokes about Microsoft - to get Windows to work sometimes you have to stand on your head, stuck your finger in your nose, bark like a dog, etc. Well, I've been tinkering with Linux and it's making Windows look so nice. Not much plug and play - not enough time to learn 1000 command line instructions. The problem with Linux seems that you have to do all that stuff that you do with Windows, but you have to do it naked.

   I was watching my latest Netflix flick, Straight Jacket, the other night and the most random scene was so funny to me. They were filming this court room scene in the movie and there were spectators in the background. When they were supposed to be murmuring things they would just say, " peas and carrots! peas and carrots!" Apparently, "when silent conversation is needed on TV (or in a movie), actors usually mouth either "natter-natter...grommish-grommish" or "peas and carrots...peas and carrots" silently in the background." Now when people are talking to me and they make no sense, I just say, "peas and carrots!" You know, they'll add the sound in later...

(source: Movie Trivia)

   It's Wednesday and I'm already craving the weekend. The past few weeks, well month really, have been non-stop. I can't really remember the last time I had a day just to myself. Every day off from work gets filled up with other things. This morning/early afternoon was spent hauling construction debris at the new building for the Center. Tonight I'm on a panel speaking about LGBT issues to college students. Later tonight I have homework due, and I have to be at work by 4am tomorrow. Then I'll be working on a volunteer program at work. There's just not a lot of time inbetween, and I feel the need to de-stress.
   Sleep would be a good thing too... but as it is, I'm headed out the door right now.

"Dr. Greg Bales, associate professor of urology at the University of Chicago, said severed penises are uncommon but surgery usually works."

···Just not something you would expect to read in the paper. Good to know through, although I hope you dont have to utilize this information at any point in your life.
(source: Man severs own penis, throws it at officers)

1. hummer limo – you know everyone has one these days. I hear Chrysler is coming out with something that guzzles even more gas though…
2. rainbow fatigues – again, another item in hot demand
3. what does it mean to be a lesbian – well, it means that.. oh, you can find that answer elsewhere!
4. rubbing vaginas – what? umm.. see search phrase number three I guess.
5. are mythbusters gay – my understanding is that they are not
6. poopy houses – apparently there are a lot more than one would think
7. who sang a song called teardrops – The Proclaimers did in 1988.
8. what is a brokeback – it’s when you hurt your back
9. gay horses – they are the ones with the brokeback
10. biblical arguments against gay marriages – there are none

   Oh dear. I opened up my business textbook to chapter 18, part 1, and the heading reads: "What is a computer?" Oh fellow students, if you do not know the answer close the textbook, call your advisor, and drop out.

“People who come from democracies often know it is not a pretty thing,” one foreign analyst said. “As the saying goes, democracy is like sausage – you may enjoy it, but you don’t want to see how it’s made.”
   So when things get ugly around here, don't worry, we're just making more sausage. (some times more disgusting than others...)
(source: Impasse reveals democracy’s perils)

   While I was checking out at the gas station this afternoon I noticed a little device that the cashier referred to as the "Paypass." (which she also said no one could get to work right). This evening I saw a commercial for it that explained what it was. Apparently MasterCard has rolled out this new technology where all you have to do is tap your credit card against this device to pay. "no more swiping or giving your card to cashiers" (Mastercard.com) Since when is swiping your card too much of a hassle? Really, does that half second it takes to swipe a card take too long?
   I know that the magnetic stripe is easy to manufacture/copy for the fraud pros so there is a need for something new. But now I wonder if you have your pass-enabled card in your wallet, couldn't someone bump up against you with a device that would read your card info? Now the stranger that you think just goosed you is actually stealing your card number.
(source: PayPass TV spot; MasterCard PayPass)

   I've been facinated by the people who protest funerals with anti-gay signs and rhetoric. And when they protested at gay peoples' funerals, despite being horrible, there was some mad logic to it. But now apparently they're protesting Iraq war veterans' funerals and apparently haven't bothered to update their signage. Have I missed something here?
   It's always been the case that when these radical people start their protests, like the laws of physics, an equal and opposite reaction takes place. (sometimes not quite equal...) Groups are protesting the protesters and forming human chains to protect the privacy of families that are at the funerals. "About 300 bikers blocked the handful of demonstrators so that family members didn't have to see the signs or hear their jeers(AFP)."
   To the people who still wave the anti-gay signs and yell at mourners, although it's despicable, I say wave on! They draw attention to whacknuts, and demonstrate to all of us where we need not go as a country and as human beings relating to others.
(sources: Protesters picket funeral of Michigan soldier in Flushing; Yahoo/AFP Photo)

   While I was in Canada over the weekend I had a craving for grapefruit juice. It was later in the evening so I went downstairs in the hotel to the concession stand. I saw the grapefruit juice, ordered and paid for it and started to walk away when I stopped. I looked at the label and saw something other than what I wanted. The label read: "Pamplemousse Rose." I thought what the heck is a "pamplemousse?? This isn't what I wanted!" I turned to J and started to complain when it occurred to me that, um, there are French speaking people in Canada. Duh, a pamplemousse is a grapefruit. (which it also said clearly on the opposite side of the label.) My dumb moment for the weekend. (well, one of them anyway)

   Random thought... why are border crossings referred to as customs? At some point were those the people who were responsible for telling people about the customs of the country they were entering? Good thing its not like that now. Everyone would think that in the US, you must be gruff and unfriendly.

   Media - exaggeration, fear, drama, ratings. just love it.
   This morning NewsNet 5 reports that "a bridge is partially collapsed" here in Akron Just saw it on the afternoon newscast - a railing came off. I just find it amusing. I guess "Railing falls off bridge" isn't really an eye-catching headline.
(source: Wild Wind Causes Portion Of Bridge To Collapse)

   What would possess someone to try to return a toilet seat to the place of purchase after 4 months because they have decided it is no longer comfortable? Just an open ended question...

   I've been kinda irritated with American automakers lately. While the Japanese have come out with several hybrid cars, the US companies are struggling behind. I have to figure that the technology is there, it's in demand, so why not make more fuel efficient cars? Obviously since the big companies can't do it, a team of high school students have taken up the challenge. They've built a sports car that does 0-60 in 4 seconds, and it runs on electric and soybeans. Maybe one of these kids should start a car company...
(sources: Sports Hybrid, Built by Kids; Hybrid Attack)

   I was watching the "pre-Oscar countdown" and saw a little ditty that made me smile. I heard a comment this week about how sick and twisted people are who come up with the line that gay marriage will be the turning point for people marrying their pets. So the Oscar video clip was of Oscar-nomiated romance films. In it they showed the King Kong movie - I didn't see the movie but they made it look like the ape and the woman had "something" going on. And they were heterosexual! Brokeback looks a little more average...

   Went to the Cleveland Auto Show tonight. It was interesting. I was especially fond of the Toyota Prius. Of course there's the awesome milage, but the design is unique. The inside is modern, sleek, and different - unlike many of the cars there that looks like an engineer designed the interior. I liked the Saturn VUE also - never really took a good look at them before.
   Chrysler's new lineup was.. embarrassing. Most of the cars got pitiful gas milage. One even had a $2000 "Gas Guzzler" tax on it. Although they weren't the only ones with abysmal milage. Chevy and Cadillac had some nasty ones too. And apparently Dodge is replacing the Neon with an ugly car that gets less milage than the Neon. Really, what are they thinking? Now when American auto makers are complaining about their sinking sales in comparison to their Japanese counterparts, no one should wonder why.
   Overall, you know, you walk around and all the trucks and cars start to look the same. It was enlightening though, and now I really want the Prius!